Tee Shirt Slogans
At My Age, Getting Lucky Is Finding My Car in the Parking Lot.
Remember When Sex Was Safe and Skydiving Was Dangerous?
(On the front) Randolph-Macon Woman's College (On the back) Not a Girls' School with No Men, but a Women's College with No Boys.
We Got Rid of the Kids -- The Cat Was Allergic.
Don't Worry, Mom -- It's Just a Phase.
Kids: You Spend the First Two Years of Their Lives Teaching Them to Walk and Talk -- and the Next 19 Telling Them to Sit Down and Shut Up.
(On the front) 60 Is Not Old . . . (On the back) If You're a Tree.
I'm Still Hot -- It Just Comes in Flashes.
I'm Not 50 -- I'm $49.95 Plus Tax.
I Know I Came Into This Room for a Reason.
Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up!
I Used to Have a Handle on Life, But It Broke.
My Reality Check Just Bounced.
Cancel My Subscription -- I Don't Need Your Issues.
Madness Takes Its Toll -- Please Have Exact Change.
Every Time I Hear the Dirty Word 'Exercise,' I Wash My Mouth Out With Chocolate.
Earth Is the Insane Asylum for the Universe.
Life Is Short -- Make Fun of It.
Buckle Up. It Makes It Harder for the Aliens to Snatch You From Your Car.
Hang Up and Drive.
I Took the Road Less Traveled, and Now Where the Heck Am I?
Welcome to Mississippi -- Set Your Watch Back 30 Years.
Use Vowels Every Day or You'll Get Consonated.
Don't Hate Yourself in the Morning -- Sleep Till Noon.
I'm Not a Snob. I'm Just Better Than You Are.
Live Your Life So That When You Die, the Minister Will Not Have to Tell Any Lies at Your Funeral.